Just over two weeks ago, my Mom’s sister sent out an urgent text: “Dad is not doing well, you should come see him as soon as possible.” Two days later she and Grandma took him to the emergency room, where he was diagnosed with kidney failure. My immediate family and I drove over to be with them, and once he was admitted to the hospital, my mom and I made the decision to stay at my grandparent’s house so that we could be close and help support the family.
Grandpa rallied in the hospital, mostly due to a blood transfusion and medications, so we had several days there to talk and spend time with him and Grandma. Once we found a good care facility, he was transferred there. Our hope was that he would continue to be lucid while we waited for relatives to come from out of town, but by the time they arrived he was mostly unable to talk. What followed was a steady decline until he passed peacefully in his sleep early Monday morning.
With Grandpa having passed, I have been reflecting on the ways God has worked in the situation. I do not currently have a job, and my mom works part time, so we were able to stay with her parents and her sister for days at a time. It was a blessing to be able to support my mom’s family, even if that just meant sitting in a hospital room with them while Grandpa slept.
Grandma rarely left Grandpa’s side, so my mom, my aunt, and I took turns bringing her food and making sure she had what she needed. Normally my grandparents prefer to live quiet, private lives without a lot of fuss, but over the last two weeks they were both open to the support we gave and looked forward to visitors.
Faith has also been a topic they did not want to discuss, but that has changed too. I found out that both of my grandparents grew up in church and while they had not been to church much since my mom’s birth, they still believed in God. It was a comfort, especially as Grandpa declined and was no longer able to speak, then was unconscious for the remainder of his life. I have hope that he was welcomed into heaven where he is face to face with Jesus and has been reunited with family who has gone before.
On Saturday, while sitting with my grandparents and holding Grandpa’s hand, I found myself reading through the Psalms, particularly Psalms 23, 25, and 27. These Psalms speak of difficulty and grief, but also of hope in God. The psalmists were not free from their situations when they wrote, but in the middle of them, and they chose to turn to God as their source of hope and strength. It was a great comfort to read how someone else chose to depend on God in a difficult time, and the cool thing about Psalms is that you can say them as a prayer to God on your own or on another person’s behalf.
Grandpa at this time was asleep, and we knew that he did not have much longer to live and may never wake up again. So I asked my Grandma if I could read Psalm 23 out loud to them, and she said yes. It was a special moment for a couple of reasons. My grandparents have been resistant to talking about God for most of my life, so for Grandma to let me read Scripture to them was a big deal. Another reason was that my Grandpa passed a little over 24 hours later, and it was one of the last things I did with him. I fought back tears the entire time, but it meant a lot to be able to share with them the comfort that I was receiving from Scripture. Grandma and I are confident that he could hear us, and I hope that it was comforting to him.
Monday morning, just a few hours after Grandpa passed, I recieved a text with a daily devotional. A friend of mine introduced me to it a few months ago, and it is called the Worship Initiative, by the band Shane and Shane. The devotional is a song to sing along to and a short teaching that goes with the song. The morning that Grandpa passed, the song they chose to sing was “Blessed Be Your Name,” by Matt Redman, a song written after 9/11/2001 and was based on Job 1:21,
“He [Job] said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
And naked I shall return there.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.”1
Needless to say, it was fitting for that to be the song I sang so soon after grief. Another song that has been on my mind over the past two weeks is “How Great Is Our God,” by Chris Tomlin. I am so thankful for music that reminds us of God, His promises, His character, and His trustworthiness!
Now comes the next part: the funeral and life without Grandpa. There are more decisions to be made, particularly for Grandma’s support and care, but I am confident that God will continue to provide comfort and provision for our needs.
Is there something that you have learned or been comforted by in your time of grief? Is there something that you would like prayer for? You are welcome to send me an email at hannah@comfortinaffliction.blog.
Resources:
If you want to learn more about praying the Psalms and finding hope in God in difficult circumstances, I highly recommend the book, Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy, by Mark Vroegop. It has been a great help as I have dealt with the onset of my disability, and even more so now that we are grieving my Grandpa’s passing.
Another book that I have found helpful the last few weeks is Helping Those Who Hurt, by H. Norman Wright. It explains what to say and do to help people who are struggling, without putting more of a burden on them or saying the wrong thing.
If you are interested in Shane and Shane’s daily devotional, you can find it at: sing.theworshipinitiative.com
(I am not sponsored by Mark Vroegop, H. Norman Wright, Shane and Shane, or Bible Gateway.)
- New American Standard Bible 1995 (NASB1995)
New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. All rights reserved. ↩︎
Comfort in Affliction 
Leave a comment